"Yeah you’ll be lonely at times, but haven’t you felt lonely and unappreciated at some point while in a relationship?"
Arguments, dishonesty, and cheating “Don’t nobody got time for that!” So keeping away from the “L” word is the best way to go. Yeah you’ll be lonely at times, but haven’t you felt lonely and unappreciated at some point while in a relationship? So why not be the cause of your own loneliness opposed to giving someone else the wheel to drive your emotions out of whack? Follow these simple steps and you’re sure to steer clear from the road of heartbreak!
What Are You Looking To Gain?
Are you dating because you’re looking for love or are you playing the field until you are ready to settle down with the person you are currently dating? This will be the most important and honest question you’ll be ask yourself throughout this whole ordeal.
Never Wear Your Heart On Your Sleeve
Now that you’ve gotten the obvious out of the way (the purpose of your dating) it’s time to avoid getting sucked in. Under no circumstances are you to ever forget why you decided to date; Do not let your guard down! No matter how “right” it feels, you need to keep in mind that emotions can be deceptive and are based off of the specifics that trigger them at that moment in time. Identifying every aspect that turns you on about the person’s physical appearance and capabilities of expressing themselves verbally should always be kept upfront. Remember, the goal is to remain standing with both feet planted in the ground. Falling in love is not an option!
Keep It Non-Physical
If you’re one of those people who can have mind blowing, hot and steamy sex without getting emotionally involved then kudos to you! But if you’re the type of person who doesn’t know how to separate a roll in sack from that roll transforming to a stroll down the aisle, then you’d better avoid sexual contact at all cost and literally remain standing with both feet planted in the ground. If not, you will surely find yourself having blurred visions of the purpose that drove you to date this person.
Be Selfish With Your Time
Unavailability leads to uncertainty! If the person you are seeing feels comfortable or falls into the routine of thinking every text and phone call at a certain time everyday will be acknowledged then you are setting the grounds for something more to flourish and emotions to become strong. You will probably find yourself falling into a routine and schedule you didn’t even make up. If you’re too lax, you become submissive. So avoid being reachable at times! You becoming comfortable can be worse than them.
Keep Your Past To Yourself
This may not apply if you are following the previous rule. Sharing your past and bashing your ex only gives this new person leeway to your heart because they are going to try to avoid every mistake your ex made based off of the information you volunteered!
The most important thing of all is avoiding routine! Routine leads to comfortability, and that leads to expectations. If you aren’t giving and/or taking up too much of their time then there is no room for you to form any meaningful feelings.
Written By: Tahanee
Follow on Instagram: @Totallytahanee
#heartache #breakup #pastrelationship #newrelationship #feelings #selfcontrol #celibacy #rules #unbrokenheart #brokenheart #everythinggirlslove #yandysmith #loveinhiphopnewyork #vh1 #newpost #followme