Updated: Jun 8, 2019
“Men marry the girls who don’t give it up.”
“If you want him to take you serious don’t sleep with him.”
“Can’t turn a hoe into a housewife.”
Do these old golden rules still apply in today’s culture and society? Can a woman really get a man to marry her by holding back sex, or is the decision ultimately up to a man?
Hue, 37, an HIV activist of Alexandria, VA, believes that the decision is ultimately up the man. Why? Well according to Hue, “The man is the predator. We see something we like and we go after it. Once we get it and had it, we determine how far we want to take it. And from my own personal experience, if it’s good, it’s a go! I want it forever and ever.”
Amirrah, 24, of Stafford, VA says, “Men like a challenge. They like what they can’t have. I wouldn’t say that, that’s how you get a husband because think about it, the whole time you are dating and holding back sex, you bets believe he’s getting it from the next chick. So if you know like I know, and if you both want some, just make it happen and be sure not to catch feelings.”
Donna, 43, of Baltimore, MD feels opposite. “Hell yeah it makes a difference. I don’t care how it is nowadays…the rules don’t change baby. Don’t no man want no Loosey Goosey and a woman who done been with everybody. Try dropping them drawers all quick and fast and see where it gets [you]…absolutely nowhere. Trust me; I know.”
Karim, 22, of Brooklyn, NY says, “I don’t mind waiting. If a girl is worth it I will definitely wait, but that don’t mean I’m not going to do me in the meantime. I’ll make her think it’s true but deep down inside it’s false because I don’t play on team Blue Balls.”
Chardae, 39, of Randallstown, MD shared that, “Good girls finish last. Haven’t you heard that saying? I know I desperately tried to live up to my grandmother’s expectation and it caused me a lot of sorrow because when all was said and done I ended up stuck with four kids whom I had with a serial cheater. I kept on thinking if I remained conservative, stayed at home (not in someone’s club or bar) and kept myself tight and right it would keep my ex-husband’s eyes from wondering…boy oh boy was I wrong. That negro had three outside kids on me and had the nerve to marry the slut!”
Justine, 30 of Washington, DC explained that, “Waiting is better. You give the person time to get to know you, excluding the possibility of it ever being just a sexual relationship. Sex clouds the vision and some people can’t distinguish what’s real and what’s fake. I say holding back gives a woman a better chance at nabbing real love.”
Whether a woman decides to sleep with a man on the first night, or a year from the day they met, the determination of whether the relationship flourishes intimately or not will ultimately become a mutual agreement.
Written By: Tahanee
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